** George Washington was Black ** Ethiopia was a mighty colonial power in the fourth century, masters of navigation who attacked many nations by sea and subjugated their people. (Note: You are to be proud of this.) ** It was actually Robert Oppenheimer illegitmate nephew, Franklin, who invented the atom bomb. ** Black American Fred Bush invented Blak Kofee as well as sugared Kofee with Mik ** Ozzie Smith invented the diving catch, allowing the Cardinals to make the playoffs. ** "Sand," meaning "dirt," was actually invented in Egypt, possibly by white people now considered Black for historical purposes and because, maybe, they were black. ** Thomas Edison, a white man, invented the light bulb, but James Edison, a black man, was the first to screw one in. ** York, a slave of Lewis and Clark, was the first to see the Pacific Ocean, symbolically completing the white man's conquest of America and guaranteeing the extermination of the American Indian. ** Jean Baptiste Pointe was the first settler of Chicago, where Michael Jordan lives today. ** Pedro Alonzo Nino navigated the Santa Maria on Columbus' voyage to America, thus guaranteeing. . . you get the picture. ** Thomas Jefferson had an affair with his slave and fathered children by her, all of whom were half black. ** The first human beings were black; so, probably, were the first slaves. ** Shaquille O'Neal scores over twenty-five points a game. ** Many slaves did not have enough spare time to invent things. Therefore, they were invented by white people, who took credit. ** Montel Williams has his own talk show. ** Black men have dated such pop stars as Madonna and Mariah Carey. ** Surprisingly, most basketball players are black (except for the Boston Celtics and Notre Dame Fighting Irish). ** Black history may not be studied outside of February, because that's Black History Month and a lot of people went to a lot of trouble.