PANTHEON OF HEROES--Living the creed of "Reduce, Reuse, Recycle," the staff of the Inquisition has announced the adverse possession of over 50 hours of comedy material. Included in the theft: "Saturday Night Live" recurring characters from 1985-88, Monty Python's dead parrot sketches, 52 stares of disbelief from "The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson", and the episodes from "Three's Company" in which there are misunderstandings.

The Inquisition has also taken the book "Emma" by Jane Austen, the collected works of Aristophanes, amusing show business anecdotes from the estate of George Burns and hilarious bloopers from the set of "Wings."

"I don't think we'll be using the Wings bloopers, but you can never be too sure when the comedy well is going to run dry. Did I ever tell you about the time I was having dinner with Jack Benny?", said Editor-In-Chief Christopher Regan. The staff is now hard at work slightly changing the material and making sure that the holders of the copyrights don't find out. "Shhhh, don't tell Park Overall about the funny retorts we stole from 'Empty Nest'. 50 more years and it's all ours," said Scruff. The staff will begin to appropriate the works of Shakespeare as soon as someone will explain them.